«This Is What I Am Looking For»

«I am enormously grateful for my time as Assistant Conductor, because this experience was an incredible gift. I heard the Tonhalle-Orchester Zürich and Paavo Järvi live for the first time in 2019 at the Tonhalle Maag. That was also my first year of study at the Zurich University of the Arts (ZHdK). I remember thinking very clearly: ‹Wow! That's what I'm looking for! If I could meet Paavo Järvi live one day ... .› Back then I would never have thought that I would even work with him one day. Crazy.

But then I actually met Paavo in a masterclass at the ZHdK two years ago - I conducted Mendelssohn's 4th Symphony, 4th movement. Shortly afterwards he invited me to the Pärnu Music Festival for the Järvi Academy. Then came another pivotal moment with Paavo: My predecessor Holly Choe was unable to attend at short notice. One Saturday evening he called and asked if I could take Holly's job on Monday. Because I had just started conducting orchestras, I had never assisted before. Moreover, I knew the works by hearing them, but I had not studied them. It was simply all new and frightening for me. But I accepted anyway, and today I'm enormously glad I did. Afterwards, I was offered the position of Assistant Conductor at the Tonhalle-Orchester Zürich.

I have not only developed as a musician this year, but I have grown as a person. There were not really difficult moments, but when there were, they were challenging. For me, it's a question of attitude or mindset. I was more shy and cautious. Through all these experiences I became more confident. I learned to think outside the box and in bigger contexts. As Assistant Conductor, I not only had to deal with Paavo, but also with the library, with the recording and management team and with all the musicians. With so many professionals. I realised that you don't just have to play classical music, you also have to communicate it actively and openly to the audience.

If I had to describe the Tonhalle-Orchester Zürich in just one word, it would be ‹richness›. Its sound is rich, warm, round and powerful. It is well thought out. It was very impressive and sometimes overwhelming how different the orchestra sounds in the rehearsals and then in the concerts. My observation is that this has to do with the energy due to the presence of the audience. The orchestra scans the audience. But that is also due to Paavo, because he is a very spontaneous conductor. It's not unusual for him to come up with ideas in the concerts that we hadn't rehearsed in this way. Small details, but that has a big effect on the musicians.

Our guest performances at the Musikverein Vienna, the Philharmonie de Paris and the Elbphilharmonie Hamburg remain unforgettable for me, because I experienced all these concert halls for the very first time. Each has a different culture, a different audience, a different acoustic.

I have learned so much from Paavo about the characteristics of each instrument. He uses long bows in his conducting. I tend to think that way now when I conduct. I am said to sing when I conduct. So it's not that I can be heard singing. What is meant is that breathing creates a phrasing. I always try to feel the sound in my hands. That way I can better influence musicians and transmit my ideas and emotions that arise from the music. For my future, I wish to work with different orchestras and conductors. I want to expand my repertoire and knowledge and become more efficient in rehearsals.

Because it is a different world, I would also like to gain experience in opera. I miss singing and sometimes I also long to be guided, as I know it from choral singing. That's where I originally come from. I am now going to be assistant to conductor Nicholas Carter at the Bern Opera in the production of ‹Tosca›. The opportunity to follow and be a part of an opera production from the first day to the last is something I'm really looking forward to.»

Recorded by Katharine Jackson

Those wishing to follow Izabelė Jankauskaitė's career can do so here.

Translated with DeepL.com